This post is a little long, so please bear with me. My colorful readers should know what code-switching is. It is second nature to us, especially if you’ve worked where you are the minority, hold on, scratch that – a minority is an understatement… more like almost the only person of color in your entire department or even one of the very few in the company of which you work.
Let me speak plainly to white people – You know your favorite coworker, Jamal – you know the one that you consider your best work friend? You talk to him about Drake and Lil Wayne, but only their more recent albums though. You think you know him, but sadly enough, you may not know much about him at all. He smiles and laughs at your not-so-funny jokes and workplace banter, but what you don’t know is that he has to mentally recharge each and every day. He goes home to recharge for another day at the office of meaningless conversations about Big Bang Theory when he would prefer to talk about Power, a show that you may know nothing about, which is fine because in this world, specifically corporate world the “Jamal’s” and “Cleasha’s” will have to assimilate into a certain type of blackness that is digestible for the everyday white person to chew.
This post is triggering for me, as I am still a work in progress on this one. My code-switch game is nothing to play with! It comes as naturally for me as breathing. As a Gemini, I am easily adaptable to any situation as is, and so at one point in mid-conversation, I was so damn fake, I even shocked myself!! I kept it going because I was able to get invited to parties and social events outside of work because I was so “cool.” I rode this wave until I was seasick because wearing a mask is mentally exhausting. It wasn’t until I turned 30 that I felt like I did not need to code-switch so heavily around people that did not look like me. At the end of the day, people will judge you before you even open your mouth.
Exhibit A. I am a social person. For those who know, I oftentimes don’t meet strangers so I would make small talk in the work break area with this guy about our breakfast in the mornings. So fast forward to the holiday party that same year, I saw “breakfast convo-coworker” and after we introduced our significant others, he proceeds to tell my husband, how we talked all the time about breakfast, and began to imitate me and my conversations with an exaggerative neck roll and Ebonics sounding statements like I was a character from a blaxploitation film. My husband and I were so confused. My coworker’s fiance subtly grabbed his arm, signaling him to stop, and out of awkwardness, I smiled and walked away. It was at that point, I concluded that no matter how much I tried to assimilate, some will still have preconceived notions about me anyway. So I will just do me!!! Be my authentic self!
Yes, the Atlanta Housewives is my favorite out of the Housewives franchise, and yes I watch all of the Love and Hip Hop reunion shows, the only Bachelorette I watched was the one that featured Rachel Lindsay, and no I do not think that Chris Hemsworth, aka “Thor” is fine! Hold up- I lied on the last one because he is kind of fine, but you get my point.
There is a certain kind of brilliance that comes along with code-switching. The way one shifts from one vernacular to another is a skill that not all people can do. With this gift, there comes a point where code-switchers can lose themselves. Sounding “too black,” which by the way is some bullsh***, is not a bad thing. I shouldn’t have to dodge the watermelon or the fried chicken at the next company function because dammit, they’re both delicious!
Ok, ok, I am being slightly extra, but you get my point. Now before someone says, well everyone code switches to some degree. Yes, that is true, as you will not speak to your great aunt the same as you do your friends, but a simple “yes and no ma’am”, does not hold a candle to constantly having to make sure that you don’t slip and say something that is unpopular, because God forbid you actually have an opinion, and not just an “angry black one” either.